Emily Tennyson was mostly known for being Alfred Lord Tennyson’s wife, having two sons, and being very kind. All of these things are true, yet there is more to Lady Tennyson than this. She was also a friend, confidant, and secretary. Born Emily Sarah Sellwood to Michael and Sarah Sellwood on July 9, 1813, she was the oldest of three daughters. They lived in Horncastle, Lincolnshire. Her mother died when she was three years old.
Growing Up
All her life, Emily had problems with a weak spine, which rendered her easily tired. She was regarded as a semi-invalid, like Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and spent much time on the sofa, though she could walk sometimes. But she had a fairly happy childhood, though it was troubled by several more family deaths, and she was considered by friends and family to be a bright and lovely child.
Meeting Alfred Tennyson
Whilst in her teens, Emily encountered the man she would marry years later. On a walk through the woods with Arthur Hallam, the best friend of Alfred Tennyson, they came upon Alfred. Emily reported that Tennyson’s first words to her were, “Are you a Dryad or a Naiad or what are you?” She speculated that it was due to the dreamy, filmy blue dress she wore. She was in love with him from that moment.
In 1836, Emily’s sister Louisa married an elder Tennyson brother, Charles. Emily was maid of honor at the wedding and Alfred was best man. It was there that Alfred claimed to have fallen in love with her when he saw her shed tears of joy over her sister’s wedding. Shortly after this, Emily and Alfred became engaged.
However, Louisa and Charles encountered problems soon in their marriage, as Charles had an opium addiction, and Louisa wanted to separate from him. Thus the Sellwood family did not want another one of its daughters to rush into marriage with another Tennyson. Emily’s father would not allow Alfred to see her, and their engagement broke off.
A Decade of Waiting
Emily and Alfred did not want to separate, though Alfred had been half-hearted at times about marrying. He had financial problems and used that as an excuse of why he could not marry. This did not comfort Emily’s father at all, especially considering the ongoing problems between Louisa and Charles.
Alfred wrote to Emily and tried to release her from their engagement, saying that she should find happiness with someone else since he could not provide for her. Emily does not appear to have accepted, however, although she was troubled not only by Alfred’s financial situation but also his religious beliefs. Emily was very deeply Christian, and worried that Alfred’s beliefs were not strong enough for the two of them to be compatible.
However, by 1849 Alfred’s financial situation had improved, and would soon publish his elegiac poem In Memoriam, which soothed Emily’s fears about Alfred’s religious principles. The two things combined, along with Emily’s unwavering love, caused Mr. Sellwood to let the duo became engaged. Friends and acquaintances of both people agreed Emily Alfred’s soulmate. On June 13, 1850, Emily and Alfred married two weeks after In Memoriam was published. Emily was 36 and Alfred, 40.
Motherhood
Emily gave birth to a stillborn boy on Easter in 1851. She and Alfred were devastated over the loss. But soon after that she became pregnant once more, and on August 11, 1852, she gave birth to another son, named Hallam after Alfred’s dear friend Arthur Hallam. On March 16, 1854 they had another son, named Lionel.
Emily was overjoyed to be a mother, and took great pride and delight in anything that her sons did. She liked to keep their hair long and dress them in old-fashioned clothing. She could not bear the thought of sending them away to school, one of the reasons being that they would have to cut their hair. Her boys were the foremost source of joy in her life.
Secretary
Emily took up virtually all of her husband’s correspondence so that he would have peace to write in. She responded to friends, well-wishers, and aspiring poets who wanted the opinion of the Poet Laureate. She also kept a journal of their life at Farringford, at Freshwater Bay on the Isle of Wight.
The volume of work was so exhaustive that in the 1870s it became too much for her frail form and she was no longer able to work at the rate she had done before. Her son Hallam came home from university and took up her spot.
A Rewarding Title and a Devastating Loss
In 1884, Alfred accepted an invitation by Prime Minister Gladstone to become a baron, after declining numerous other invitations to do so. Emily became a baroness, called Emily Lady Tennyson at her request.
By 1886, Emily’s second son Lionel had an office career in India. While there, he became ill with fever and boarded ship to England. On the journey home, he became worse and died on the ship. He was buried at sea. He was 32 years old and left behind a widow and three sons. Emily and Alfred were devastated.
Widow
In 1892, after a short illness, Emily’s husband Alfred died. He was 83 years old; Emily was 79. She devoted the rest of her days to helping her son Hallam compile materials for a biography on Alfred. She died on August 10, 1896. She was 83 years old. Her last words are reported to have been, “I have tried to be a good wife.” She is buried at All Saints’ church on the Isle of Wight.
Sources
Martin, Robert Bernard, Tennyson: The Unquiet Heart (London: Clarendon Press, 1983).
Thwaite, Ann, Emily Tennyson: The Poet’s Wife (London: Faber and Faber Limited, 1996).
 |
